Abbey Road Revisited

One Sunday last summer there was an ad in the Parade magazine from an online poster web site. In the ad there was a poster of The Beatles crossing Abbey Road. I loved that album when it came out in the fall of 1969. I was a senior in college. It was the last album recorded by the Beatles (although Let It Be was released after Abbey Road). Knowing at the time that the Beatles were breaking up...it took on a sadness, realizing the end of an era. Plus, that whole thing with Paul being dead and all. Doctor, mortician, dead Paul, grave digger. Whew! It's all so obvious!

Well, shortly after seeing that ad, I went online and mocked up the poster with a nice wooden frame and a double matting. I thought it would go nicely on the one big empty wall in my dining room, or maybe on the wall over my headboard in my bedroom. The price was presented, but before I finalized the sale, I thought I would sit on it for a while, hearing in my head the old cliche, "Buy in haste, repent at leisure." If I really liked it I figured I would be drawn back to it and place the order.

Well, as things go...I found a discount site online and found what I thought was a similar set up, but at a fraction of the price! No brainer! Click! Click! Click! I placed my order. After about two weeks I received a nice package at my door. I was so excited! I opened it and placed it on the wall. What do you think? Worth the savings???

The Twilight Zone

Boy, did I look forward to this show every week when I was growing up. Talk about mind blowing! I originally was going to write about my own personal 'twilight zone', but I think I'll save that for a future post when I have more time and energy.


I found this image of my all time favorite episode, The Eye of the Beholder. I was upstairs in my parents room, watching this on the small black and white screen TV, sitting there with no lights on. That was the best way to watch this show. As the story unfolded and the bandages were slowly removed, the tension inside me was building. The nurse gasps! The surgical scissors drop to the floor! "No change!" A quick glimpse of the nurse! YIKES!!!!! Up I jump and shut the tv off and run downstairs! My mother notices that I'm white as a sheet. Man, I love this show!

Sunday Afternoon

Sunday afternoons have taken on different meanings to me through various periods of my life.

As a kid, Sunday afternoons were a time to spend with extended family. For a while, during the summers, we would go on a picnic every Sunday, with relatives from my mother's side of the family. Nana would make stuffed peppers. We'd go for walks along the Indian Ladder Trail in Thatcher Park. As we got a little older, we went up to Brown's Beach on Saratoga Lake. [I see where a developer is planning some mammoth tourist project there.]

We would also share our Sunday afternoons with relatives from my father's side of the family. We would gather at my grandparents house. The adults would play pinnocle or Tressette. And, as Italians do, we would eat. We made up our own games to pass the time. Shark, being one of the most exciting (as if!)

Once my own family came along, Sunday afternoons became a time to spend at home, hanging out together, relaxing, reading, playing games, visits from parents, and of course, eating. We would also spend time at church and due to physical limitations at church, that time would alternate years, mornings one year, afternoons the next. But it was a time to be together.

Sunday afternoons are time alone for me much of the time now. I use the afternoon to relax, reflect, listen to music, read the paper. On occasion there may be someplace to go with extended family or friends. My kids live in different areas of the country now and there are no weekly Sunday afternoons getting together. Now hearing their voices on the phone takes on it's own special and precious meaning for Sunday afternoon.

I Don't Feel Like Dancin'

Just try to NOT dance to this song . . .

Well...I starting redeeming my iTunes gift cards....can you tell?

Winter Doldrums...

BLAH!

Starting to daydream...

All is Well!!

All of the tests came back negative or whatever it is to show nothing irregular. Her scans and x-rays and stress tests and bloodwork all look good! Mia got to sleep in her own bed last night! And, she was in bed asleep before 9:00pm!!!

Thanks to all for your prayers and words of support and encouragement.

Sit with me and hold my hand

Sometimes that is so difficult to do. What with all the different demands and nonsense pulling us in all directions. And sometimes just being with someone is the best gift we can give, both to another and to ourself. Unable to do that simple and loving act this past two days has made very clear and real the problem of this great distance.

I received a phone call on Sunday morning from my daughter Mia. She just wanted to let me know that she was in the hospital. On Saturday night while laying on the bed with her sister Gina watching a movie, she suddenly had a tremendous pain in her chest and her back, and her left arm was going numb. She said she thought she was going to die. In the hospital they were running all sorts of tests: EKGs, blood work, imaging. Her blood pressure was very low and her blood was very dark. This morning she underwent the first part of her stress test and at 1:00pm the doctor will be in to do some more, from what I understand.

Her Mom told me this morning that she didn't want them to leave her last night. She wanted to go home and sleep in her own bed. If I was there I could have stayed with her and held her hand. I'm so worried and I'm praying that it's just some sort of fluke and nothing serious or life threatening. Needless to say, I have been very distracted these past 24 hours.

I love my children very much. And I miss them a lot because of this distance. I miss being more a part of their lives and that includes the school open house nights and the trips to the mall and walking Luke. I miss the pizza / movie nights and just hanging out and being together. Having them visit for the holidays was great, but it went by in the blink of an eye.

Omigosh! Snow!

When I woke up I noticed a brighter than usual reflection coming upwards into my window. Before I put on my glasses I noticed all this 'white' on the ground outside my bedroom window.

Well, finally! I guess it's officially winter! Maybe I'll skip work and go sledding and make a snowman!
One of my friend's blog mentioned a ritual in the snow with his dog, and it reminded me of Luke and one of his first experiences with snow. I guess you could say he 'threw' himself into it! No snow for Luke now down in Florida!

Hibernating

I felt like a bear this weekend. I mean, maybe I just acted like one...the hibernating kind. It all started on Saturday night. There was an icy coat over everything. I stepped onto the sidewalk at the corner, right where it slopes for access for wheeled transportation, and WHOOSH!!! Out went my legs from under me! Luckily, no bruises or black and blue marks or aches resulted. Just a quick look around to see if anyone was watching. I haven't taken a fall like that since I starred in that cowboy routine in Stars on Ice!

I slept in late on Sunday, and not quite so late on Monday. Since the ice was still hanging around on both days, I decided to stay (hibernate? cocooning?) in my apartment and not get out of my PJs until late Monday afternoon. Slothful, one might say?

My stay wasn't completely unproductive (or not). I decided to try once again to get into the 5th year book of Harry Potter. I've tried several times, but not managed to get beyond around page 100. So, to prepare myself, I watched all four of the previous stories on DVD. Not in rapid succession, mind you, but in a relaxed pace, almost in a bear-like slumber.

Now I have a pasttime for these wintry days that just say to me, "Stay in!"

I also have a bunch of picture frames just calling to me and boxes of photographs that I want to go through. I have this plan to pick some happy memories and put them into frames. Maybe Harry Potter can wait some more.

Dilemma . . . What to do......?

I found out this past week that one of our full time staff members will be leaving at the end of this coming week for a promotion to the main office. I've been asked to work additional days and hours if I could. Hmmmmm? Coming on the heels of that nasty write-up threatening termination? And not one good word in the write-up about the good job I'm doing?

AAARRRGGGHHHH!!! I lost it!!!

I did it! I lost it! And now I'm getting written up. It's one of those CYA moves, I guess. But still, it reflects on me.

We have been short staffed at work, and we have those busy days when the lines just do not end. On Friday I had one woman approach my station talking loudly on her cell phone . . . telling the person on the other end of the line, her email address. The chatter did not hint of anything more than one side of those annoying conversations that everyone within 50 feet can hear in detail.

She threw her membership card on the counter and continued talking on the cell, not saying one word to me. Since I still do not speak sign language nor have I mastered mindreading yet, I figured I'd wait till she finished her conversation, and continued to count my new cash in my drawer. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see that she was getting fidgety. She then threw her payroll check on the counter, still saying nothing. I continued to count. She then made a comment about just cashing her check. By then I was annoyed that she was behaving so rudely and disrespectful. I told her that I would be happy to do her transaction when she was finished with her phone call. She snapped back...just cash my check.

I told her that I would appreciate it if we could concentrate on our business transaction because I want to make sure that I don't make a mistake. She said that if we didn't want people talking on the phone then we should put up a sign, to which I replied, "Would it make a difference?" We already have a sign that says Wait here for the next teller, but many people approach the window anyway. She then told me that her mother had recently died and that this was a very important call. I replied (maybe here I lost it) that I had lost both of my parents but it is not an excuse to be rude to people. Which I guess was a very wrong thing to say to her because she immediately lodged a complaint after I gave her her money.

I think that more than her talking on the phone was the arrogant and disrespectful way that she treated me. I conduct transactions many times with the other person on the cell phone, but they usually excuse themselves and at least talk in a civil manner to me, not just throw things at me. And many of them end the conversation when they approach the window.

Reminder to self: Don't sweat the small stuff and don't sweat an idiot's behavior. Just smile and give them a not-so-nice hand jester under the counter where they can't see it.

Christmas Trimmings

On Monday I took down my tree and all the Christmas decorations. We have a tradition of leaving stuff up until Little Christmas on January 6th. But I do get to a point when I just want it all put away and for things to get back to "normal", whatever that is.

As I pack things away, it always reminds me of Christmases past, and of unpacking them with all the anticipation of the approaching holiday and then repacking them, wishing that the actual holiday itself didn't go so fast.

I remember one early January exactly 29 years ago, as I was clearing the mantle of the Christmas decorations and packing them away, thinking that the next Christmas when we unpacked them and put them up, that we would have a little baby in our home. The excitement of that thought blunted any sadness of packing that stuff away!

Christmas 2006 was a good one. In the fall, I wasn't sure if I even wanted to put up any decorations. But when Mia and Gina planned a trip up for the week before Christmas, that was the motivation that I needed. I decorated and then some. I decided it was also time to build new memories, so replaced some of the older decorations with new ones, symbolic of new life and changes. I also displayed sentimental reminders of good times past, like Santas and reindeers and snowmen that were gifts from the children. I also put out a couple of 'old' plastic decorations that my mother and father had from over 50 years ago. They are among my earliest memories of Christmas and I still love seeing them.

Although I get a little sad to move ahead to a usually bleak January, Gina's birthday adds much needed fun and excitement to the month! Plus, a new year is a new slate with no writing on it yet. There are many new adventures ahead!

And now I have another souvenir, a green fedora from New Year's Eve. As a friend suggested, I've also got a hat to wear on St. Patrick's Day!

Another Sunrise, Another Sunset . . .

Wow! Another year has come and gone! It was a very good year in many ways. The year ended with a visit from my son Joe and his wife Joy. It was a short visit but a fun one! We had two days chock full. We went to dinner on Friday night for Korean food . . . and had enough leftovers for another meal or two. We celebrated Christmas together and exchanged gifts. And we talked about many things . . . where we've been, where we are, and where we hope things will go! We also had some down time to just relax, and some time to visit extended family.

Joe set up his train for the first time in a long time around the holidays. And that caused me to reflect on a few things, among them, how quickly time passes and the memories that are etched on our brain and in our hearts, and thanks to Kodak, on paper.

I was hoping to get a current pic of Joe with the train, but alas, my request was late and the train had departed the station (translation: packed away with the Christmas tree!) So anyway, here's to a span of 26 years of driving that train! Woo! Hoo!

Good-bye 2006!

It's that blank canvas time of year again. A year ahead...what will it bring? What good changes? What areas of growth? What areas of sadness or maybe loss? A cold, bleak January, hopefully a thaw (did we freeze yet?). February...those conversational hearts. March, maybe a huge blizzard? April . . . warming . . . mud . . . blossoms . . . re-birth. And May all in bloom. I especially like seeing those tulips. They are the perfect flower for kids to draw! They also remind me of my grandfather (Nana's husband.) I remember the tulips along the side of their house.

This is also a time of looking back. How fast the year went. Weren't we just taking the Christmas decorations down from last year?

2006 has certainly been a year of changes. Another new job . . . going from full time insanity to part time relative calm and pleasure . . . super co-workers and environment. Developing new friendships that have been both a tremendous support and have also led to the blossoming of a social life! I attended a retreat around the 4th of July holiday that has allowed me to move on with my life with a new understanding and appreciation for each new day.

Many nice visits from my children have made this a good year for growth in our relationships. Gina having her braces removed in the summer. Mia working full time (and then some) at Walt Disney World. Adele leaving and serving on a mission. Joe and Joy setting up housekeeping in Queens. I have seen amazing growth in all of our children. I am very proud of all of them!
I was also priviledged to visit Joe and Joy in New York City in early spring and saw Joy perform in her acting gig in The Big Stew! I LOVED IT! And I got to visit Mia and Gina and Luke in Orlando in the autumn . . . and got to meet Minnie Mouse up close and personal!

We cleaned out and sold Dad's house in August. Our childhood home is no longer in the family. But we got to celebrate the dawning of 2006 with our last holiday party in the house while Adele was still living there. It was a good send off!

There were also some other changes that are not happy ones. Our divorce became final. Our relationship is changed, but hopefully 2007 will bring us further along in the healing process.

2006 . . . another chapter in our life story. And the beat goes on . . .